For His Glory

Shocker! I voiced my opinion on a medical on line community board. I apparently offended people. Honestly, I just had to do it. The board is an excellent source of information. When I have medical questions I usually search there before hounding my doctors. Lately, however, I have become increasingly impatient. Reading through all the complaining kills me.  I just want to find my answers and move on. And, yes, I know what you are thinking. And, yes, I know I don't sound very "Christian" like. Five guesses as to which parent in our household kissed cuts and scrapes? #notme  #LOLZ.

Let me preface this post by saying I am not talking about terminally ill patients.  So here's the deal. We all have stuff. If I told you that I was in so much pain on Monday that I was popping pain killers like they were tic tacs would it change the situation? Nope, it would not. 

It happens every single November like clockwork. Between the time change and the weather my body is in grave pain. Do you need to know that sometimes my arms are so weak I forgo washing my hair? Or that my legs feel like they have sandbags attached to them? That I often cancel physical therapy because it hurts to get into my vehicle? Or that the time change causes insomnia which deprives my tissues of oxygen? Or that the fatigue causes me to stay in my pajamas because I can't muster up the energy needed to dress? Or that the fall causes my Raynauds to turn my lips and fingers bright purple due to lack of circulation ? 

You do not want to know these things nor do you need too every single time you talk to me. Now if you asked me how you could help me? I would immediately say  "pray that I can keep moving". Simple, right? Evidently not.

As a society we have become a bunch of complainers. And, yes, I've contributed my fair share. But lately it seems to be worse than ever. I don't discount pain. It's real. And everyone's pain is different. But have we become so accustomed to "me me me" that we forget "Him Him Him"? 

Have you seen the movie "The Passion of the Christ"? If not, rent it. It's an outstanding visual of the inexplicable pain Jesus Christ bore for our sins. That's real pain. That's true love. Jesus never complained about the pain. He did, however cry out to His Father. Shouldn't that be our example? Shouldn't we be crying out to the Lord with our pain? 

Another interesting observation is that Jesus helped the thief on the cross. In the midst of being crucified He turned His head to encourage and help the thief. To assure Him that he would see him in heaven.

What if we, in the midst of our pain, helped others? Took the focus off of ourselves and concentrated on our brethren? An amazing thing happens when you do that. Your pain starts to lesson as you walk along side someone else's medical journey.  

I am not belittling pain. I know pain all too well. And, yes, there was a season in my life when it consumed me. That is exactly where the enemy wants us. When we take the focus off of ourselves, stop verbalizing every single thing, and help someone else a powerful thing happens. We die to ourselves. We give the best that we have to someone who really needs it. Slowly we realize that our pain becomes manageable. It's still there and it's real but it's doable.

Of course there are days we need to give ourselves permission to heal. Even Jesus went off into the wilderness for 40 days. Our pain can become our wilderness. We can be tempted by the enemy to succumb. Or we can be like Jesus and spend that time in communion with our Father.

Every single thing in this life happens for a reason. Pain is part of life. It can define who we are or it can be used for His glory.  

"When You said, "Seek My face," my heart said to You, 
"Your face, O LORD, I shall seek."-Psalm 27:8

The Ugly Undergrowth

At the end of our driveway we had two very large dying pine trees. Amazingly the dead ugly trees looked healthy but we knew they were diseased. We had not cut them down prior because they did a great job at hiding our firewood pile, trashcans and recycling bin. Once the trees were cut down? Full out klampetville in plain sight at the end of our driveway. The undergrowth was exposed and ugly. We didn't want to offend the neighbors or have them judge us.

The good news was that with the trees gone sunlight was able to completely shine down on the ugly undergrowth. My husband raked up the underbrush and put out grass seed. Amazingly within a day tiny bright green sprouts started to peak through. We still needed a way to organize the wood pile and neatly contain the city issued trash and recycling bins. Overall it was already looking brighter.

A week went by and the ugly spot at the end of the driveway was starting to take shape. It was still rough and needed some work. Yet I could envision the possibilities. We decided to build a storage building that would house patio furniture cushions and my husbands fishing and duck hunting paraphernalia. We designed it to match the color of our home. We added window boxes and my husband spend one night in the rain adding a picket fence.

The once dead trees that hid the ugly undergrowth had turned into a darling addition to our backyard. Actually it turned out better than I expected! 

Isn't this such a perfect example of our lives without Jesus? We may have an exterior that looks normal. Maybe even a larger than life personality. Or a beautiful exterior. But inside we are spiritually empty.  We may even feel dead inside. 

Once we allow Jesus into our hearts the exterior is taken down. The ugliness is exposed. Beautifully and meticulously the Lord plants seeds in our lives. He has a plan for us. We may not realize He's doing it because we are still so exposed. 

One day we wake up and we have joy in our lives. We can actually envision our lives with love, purpose, servitude and thankfulness. We are able to give the glory of our lives to Christ. Then some where down the road we realize we are complete. We are full of his love and peace. 

When we look back at the exterior we had put up to cover the ugliness? The pain of the walls coming down? We realize we are not only healed, whole and free but life is more beautiful than we expected.

"Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it"-Matthew 10:39

People Who Are Difficult

I posted an article from the Huffington Post on Facebook the other day. It was written by author Richard Paul Evans. The article was titled "How I Saved My Marriage". The gist of the article was that Paul and his wife were at an impasse. They were trying to avoid divorce. He wanted her to change. She wanted him to change. The Lord told him to not only change but to serve his wife. (I'll post the link at the bottom).

When I read the article it was as if it were written by my husband a decade ago. The authors child is quoted in the article. It could have been our daughter talking about us. It touched me so much that I called Robin at work "You've got to read this" I told him. That evening when he got home I read it a loud. For a few seconds he was silent. Then he just smiled "Oh, wow".

How many times have you struggled with another human being? Every meeting is strained. Every encounter leads to an argument. Or maybe there's no arguing at all but rather silent confrontation. We cry out to God "Lord, I'm trying to honor you in my walk but Joe Blow is just impossible! Lord, help soften his heart". Ring a bell? Anyone? You can visualize my short little arm waving ferociously right now.

I've written before about my mother and her mirror theory. My mother would listen to me whine or complain in high school about someone. Then she would say "Lillibet, God puts people in our path who are difficult. I've found that those I don't like are usually mirroring something I don't like about myself". All these years later I think Jane Condrey was absolutely dead on.

Jesus Christ died on a cross for you and for me. He took all of our sins even though he was sinless. He served us. He was the ultimate sacrifice. He offered us everlasting life and forgiveness for our sins. We certainly don't deserve it...at all. He loves us unconditionally every second of every single day despite how sinful we are. He never leaves us or forsakes us. He has no agenda. There is no "Joe Blow I love you but..." 

In the book of Luke chapter 6 verse 27 we are told "But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you". Jesus life is a perfect example of this. He loved those who hated him. He loves those who hate him today. Not only does he love them? If they accept him as their Lord and Savior he blesses them. 

When was the last time you blessed someone who you just really don't care for? When was the last time you served someone you take for granted? I'm trying to be intentional about serving my husband. He's much better at it than I am. I don't deserve his grace much of the time. He's currently in the pouring rain, in the dark, building me a fence to hide our trashcans. He's a doer. I'm better at verbally telling him how great he is. Or cooking for him or keeping his day in order. 

Twenty-six years later we are finally figuring out that serving one another, especially when we least feel like it, brings out Jesus in both of us. It's not perfect but it's pretty darn great. 

"He was handed over to die because of our sins, and he was raised to life to make us right with God"-Romans 4:25

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/6958222

Touchdown!

I read a quote this weekend by Christian Comedian Chonda Pierce that I just love. It completely resonated with me:

"My Childhood was filled with secrets. We were never encouraged or allowed to speak the truth about what was "really" going on behind the scenes in our home. As I grew up and out of that - I chose to speak up and speak out. There is no testimony in your life with out testifying. My story is messy. My life is overwhelmed by pain, grief, sin and dysfunction. I have not been a perfect wife or mother. But I still laugh, I love and I breathe. I love God more than any accolade, attention, or stardom. Unshakeable intimacy with Jesus. It has been tested, tried and I cannot be convinced that he does not love me. I am redeemed, reconciled and will rejoice forever. He is the Lord of my life, Healer and Comforter”.

I have never been to a single high school class reunion. Not one. I guess I never thought I was memorable. My husband loved his high school. He could never wrap his head around why I wouldn’t want to attend  my reunions. High school was  a confusing time in my life both socially and at home.  I had convinced myself, in my mind,  that the whole four years were just miserable. And then my brother reminded me that I had received a senior superlative out of a class of over 400. I had completely forgotten that.  There were good memories. Mostly I think God just used that time, unbeknownst to me, to prepare my heart for Him.

This past Saturday night my husband and daughters alma mater celebrated their 50th anniversary with a  gala at our country club. My husbands cousin came to stay with us. It was a joy watching Kelly and Robin relive happy shenanigans from back in the day. Saturday night we went to the party. We had a blast. I saw friends from college, my daughters former teachers and coaches, parents of our kids friends that we hadn’t seen in years. It was great fun.  I had one of my husbands high school friends pull me aside to tell me that I was the most transparent person she had ever read. As an individual I am actually a bit shy. I guess that's why I felt the call to write. To share.  I immediately thought of Chonda Pierces quote "There is no testimony in your life with out testifying”. 

How many times do we go through the motions of “Hey how are you?” “I’m great how are you?” When in fact, we are not great. Now there is a place and a time to share. The grocery store is not the place to unload all of your woes on your neighbor who was simply saying “hey”. But I have found that the Holy Spirit will nudge us. He will give us the discernment of when and whom to share our story with. The greatest gift you can give another human being is hope. Hope that life is good. Hope that there is redemption in any circumstance…period.

I loved listening to all of the high school stories this past weekend. Looking at yearbooks. Laughing over 80’s hairstyles. Listening to the larger than life recaps of sporting moments. But you know what I loved more? Sharing God’s love with that one person who approached me.  Here’s the thing about your story. It’s yours. No one can take it from you. And, actually, it’s yours to give away. Without giving it away? No one will ever know the power of the Gospel. Living, breathing, modern day miracles. Standing before you. A life transformed by the undeserved, unmerited, love of a remarkable Savior. God's Grace. 

The fact is that our lives are messy. We can lie and say they are not. We can embellish and make them sound fabulous. We can do everything we know how to do monetarily and physically to convince ourselves and our little world that we are fabulous. The truth is it's all a lie. I find that refreshing. If we were able to create that perfect family utopia Jesus never would have had to die for us, Amen?

I have made huge mistakes in friendships, my marriage and my parenting. Unlike those high school momentous milestones I don’t particularly care to replay or relive them. But they are important. Those mistakes are (and continue to be) the foundation of who I am. Those mistakes laid the foundation for Christ to change my heart. To change me. To save me.

If Jesus Christ is your Lord and Savior? If He has redeemed and reconciled your life? That's your story! That's the moment in history worth reliving and retelling. That's the touchdown. That's the undefeated season. That’s your redemptive story that just may give someone else victory. That's the good stuff.

"They triumphed over him (the accuser) by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death"- Revelation 12:11

Seasons

"You expected to be sad in the fall. Part of you died each year when the leaves fell from the trees and their branches were bare against the wind and the cold, wintery light. But you knew there would always be the spring, as you knew the river would flow again after it was frozen"-   Ernest Hemingway 

Everyone and their brother loves the fall season. Except me and evidently Ernest Hemingway . I am a UV10 kind of girl. The brighter the better. Fall to me represents shorter days which means less light and more time indoors. Fall also brings forth sad emotions for me. Both of my parents, prior to their death, started their rapid decline of health  in the fall. My youngest child seemed to have repeated difficulty over the years in the fall. Fall to me represents loss. Great sadness.

Whenever this melancholy feeling hits I push it down. Bury it with as much activity as these bones can handle. This fall we are throwing a party and taking three trips. Tackling some major home projects. But in the still moments? Profound sadness. I find myself weeping in the quiet. I know He has a plan. My heart is still broken.

My husband and I both have found that we are, once again, sleeping with our clothes folded neatly beside the bed. Subconsciously waiting for the phone call in the middle of the night. My mother in law will occasionally text us after 11PM we both quietly jump to check our phones. We are still processing our past year. Still grieving. Still praying for a miracle. Still questioning our skill or lack there of as parents. Such sorrow. 

A friend recently texted me this verse: 

"You will never know who you are until you know who God is"-Exodus 3:6 

I have read and re-read this verse repeatedly over the past several weeks. Have I not really known God all along? Is the enemy messing with me? My head knows that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. My flesh? I'm weary. 

If you've walked the path of addiction, marital infidelity or even betrayal you understand the complete toll it takes on your entire family. Even when you remove yourself from the situation you find waves of emotion tend to skim to the surface at random moments. You question who you are. You question your sanity. You question your motives. It is through this process that we must have a firm foundation in Christ. If we don't we are giving satan an open invitation into our warfare. 

So let's go back to Exodus 3:6. Who are you?  Are you broken beyond repair? Or are you broken but know the repair is methodically, sometimes painfully, taking place by the Master surgeon? 

Even Ernest Hemingway recognized the seasons that ebb and flow. Some seasons are tough. Lately I find myself going back to the cross. Picturing the emotional and physical pain Jesus went through. He knew His father was using Him to make the world right again. But the season was excruciating. He called out to the Father in desperation "My God My God why have you forsaken me?!" (Matthew 27:46) The pain and sorrow were more than he thought He could bare... even though He knew he would be in paradise soon.

Pretty sure God gave us seasons for a reason. Like anything it's our response to the outcome that matters. We are called to walk out life through all seasons in a holy manner. Even when we don't feel one bit of holiness inside of us. And I think that's okay. So long as we cry out to the Lord just as Jesus did. That is God's promise to us.

I love Romans 12:12 which says: 

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." 

If we can see Him in the season. If we can see Him in our affliction. If we faithfully call out to Him. The sorrow will pass. And just as Hemingway observed the river will flow again after it has been frozen. The season will pass and spring will return with new growth and beautiful blossoms.

"The Lord is my Shepard I lack nothing"-Psalm 23:1

If I Were Queen

Is it just me or has the world become increasingly more chaotic? With all of the choices we've granted ourselves as a society the more complicated life has become. In the name of inclusiveness we have created great division.

Increasingly Christians are being persecuted. I find this ironic don't you? God is the original author of "love thy neighbor". From the outside looking in its easy to see why our youth are so lost. 

Pop culture tells them "dare to be different". On the contrary actually. One quick parooze through a newsfeed and you see a different story. You see J.Crew like models having a fabulous time. If you aren't model-esk? If you aren't having the "best time ever"? Well, you're not different you are simply a looser. "FOMO" has become a real thing--fear of missing out.

I wish I could speak to every young person in this country. I'd tell them "YDY". You do you. No one can do you better than your own self. Stop trying to be something you are not. Your quirkiness? That's what makes you you! God gifted you those idiosyncrasies. Don't blame someone for it. Thank Him! Figure out why He blessed you with that attribute. Then use it to help someone else.

If I were queen of the young people for one day?  I'd tell them that every single person in their life--yes, even the horrible ones--were intentionally placed in their path by God. I'd tell them rather than playing the victim? Figure out what God's intent was. What did you learn about yourself through that experience? Did you become a hot mess? Or were you hot to give people the message of what God was teaching you?

I'd tell young people that not everyone is going to like you. And that is their perogative. You are going to be left out. No one is required to like you or include you. You are not entitled to inclusion regardless of what society or your parents tell you. Life is tough. It's meant to teach us lessons. It's meant to refine us not harden us. Go find your own people. The ones who like you. The ones who love you.

If I were queen of Americas youth for one day? I would tell them all of the things I have done to screw up my life. I'd tell them in great detail who I hurt and who hurt me.  I'd tell them that I really like me now despite not liking my past track record. Your mistakes don't have to define the rest of your life. Redemption is sweet and a gift. 

If I were queen of the young people of America for one day? I would tell them about the King. The One who died for me. The One whose precious blood erased all of the unforgivable things in my past. The One who wipes away every tear. The One who makes ALL things new.

If I were queen of the young people of America for one day? I'd tell them I wish I had spent more of my youth being comfortable in my own skin rather than trying to fit where I never was meant to be. 

If I were queen of the young people of America for one day? I'd tell them I wish I had the foresight to see closed doors were Gods protection. I spent far too much time trying to unlock doors that should have never been re-opened. 

If I were queen of the young people of America for one day? I'd tell them to be in this world but not a part of it. Life's greatest joys will come with fellowship of like minded Believers. Those Believers will be the most diverse and beautiful inclusive friendships you will ever experience this side of heaven.

I'm not queen, okay in my mind I am, but I do have a King. His name is Jesus Christ. Young people, now more than ever you need Him. He knows every single hair on your head. He knew you before you were born. He loves you desperately.  

In this crazy, upside down world He died right side up for you. He wants to be your everything. Your King. What do you have to loose?  A lifetime of emptiness or eternity spent with a purpose. Ask Him into your heart today.

"Jesus replied, 'very truly I tell you, no one can see the kingdom of God unless they are born again'"-John 3:3

Ready Or Not

My husband I are throwing a party at the end of the month. Celebrating a lovely young couple who are newly engaged. We have about three weekends to get our house in order to welcome over 50 guests. We will be out of town two of those weekends. Yikes. With all the excitement there is also a twinge of "are we going to be ready in time?"

Robin and I usually work really well together. I'm a great starter. He's a wonderful finisher. I have a creative eye. He is an organizer.  We both  realized that, as much as we are anticipating a fun evening, we have a lot to do to prepare. 

Honestly, if we had been on top of the little fix it jobs over the years?  This would be a breeze. With the obligations of college tuition, sorority dues, car insurance  for two daughters over the past several years we have put a lot on the back burner. 

The fact remains that no amount of planning is going to change the fact that the party will be a go. Regardless if we are ready or not. The invitations are out. The people are coming. Does that sound familiar? Ring a bell? Know where I am going with this?

How many of us are just not ready to see our Lord and Savior? We know He's coming. It's undeniable because the bible tells us so. He has told us so. There are actually 15 versus that I can think of that tell us Jesus Christ is coming back for his church. This is my favorite:

“At that time the sign of the Son of Man will appear in the sky, and all the nations of the earth will mourn. They will see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of the sky, with power and great glory. And he will send his angels with a loud trumpet call, and they will gather his elect from the four winds, from one end of the heavens to the other”- Matthew 24:30-31

Many of us are still deeply entrenched in the relationships, things, and adventures of this world. A world that is currently and temporarily  ruled by the evil one. And even so many Christians don’t want to leave. They can not imagine anything being more glorious than their own creature comforts here on earth. Most young mother’s or young adults I talk to have much left that they hope to accomplish here on earth.  They want to live life and then they will prepare.  They are excited to serve the Lord…here on earth. They look forward to the Lord’s return…but not yet. They still want more time.

It’s easy for my husband and I to get caught up in the preparations of this party. Making things beautiful. Perfect. Do I want my home to look like the cover of Architectural Digest? Of course! And what a bonus it would be if we were to accomplish that!  The reality is the party is about a group of people coming together to celebrate a couple who has committed to say “I do” before God.  It’s not about how perfectly prepared my home is. Prepared or not the people are coming. 

Don’t get caught up in so many of the minute details of this temporal life.  Enjoy the party. After all, if you’ve said “I do” to Jesus? The celebration, one day,  is going to be HUGE! No one and I mean no one is honestly going to care about anything else. 

The bible clearly tells us the Lord is returning. It's His promise to His Beloved. We will have the privilege of being in heaven for all eternity with our Savior. There will be no more pain, no more crying, no more suffering (Revelation 21:4).

The most important thing you can do in this world today? Accept the invitation from Jesus Christ. Invite Him into your heart. Tell Him “I do”. There are no preparations except your decision to make Him your King. Regardless of when you decide to accept Jesus as your savior He is returning for His church. The bible tells us we do not know the day or the hour. Scripture does make clear that we will know the season. So why wait? Why risk missing out on all eternity? 

"so we tell others about Christ, warning everyone and teaching everyone with all the wisdom God has given us"-Colossians 1:28