I do think, however, that Christian parents may have a bit of a leg up. Before you moan out loud "Oh dear, Gawd, here goes another lecture from a pompous born again" let me explain.
If we have laid biblical foundations and principles for our kids there is always a reference point for our family. When our children are little it is our job to teach them about Jesus. Not just some figure flying in the sky that we worship on Sunday mornings. Jesus. Our Savior, our comforter, our protector. Jesus the center of our home. Our compass for our family.
Thru conversation and example a moral standard is established and understood. Through discussion we can say to our kids "can you tell me why you did that? Can you tell me what a better behavior would be? Do you remember the story of Jonah? He felt exactly like you do. How did God teach him? What is God trying to teach you?"
Scripture is our road map. Parenting doesn't come with an actual instruction guide. Or does it? God has provided us with a beautiful love story written for us, to us, about us by the One who adores us. The bible not only provides a moral standard to reference but it gives our children a foundation. It helps them to see how beautiful life is meant to be. Not easy but with a purpose.
Laying the foundation is monumental and hard work. And guess what? It may not always work. Those little people we raise? Well, they eventually develop their own personalities. They don't do it to spite us. They do it because God gave us the choice of free will.
During adolescence we can continually reinforce Godly expectations. Teaching and guiding our kids based on who Jesus says we are in Him. More than anything we pray. We pray that our core beliefs as adults, parents, and as a family are enough. And then we release our children into the world.
God has really opened our eyes as it pertains to our daughters. Admittedly we, on occasion, were finger pointers. "Why did you do this and not that? We did not raise either of y'all to do that". This led to blow ups. Our kids felt judged. Then one day it dawned on us. "We've laid the foundation that's all we can do." Just keep pointing them towards the cross.
Here's the beauty of Gods written word: His rules reign. He doesn't make mistakes. He doesn't criticize. However His directions for following Him are quite clear.
We are now able to say to our college aged kids "Here's what God has to say. Not Mom & Dad but God of the universe. We are not crazy about your plans. We don't agree with it. But we love you. As long as you are fully aware of the consequences to your decisions based on God's written word? Well, that's your choice. If you need help or change your mind you know our door is always open".
We raise them to release them. The letting go is hard. It can be scary. "Did I teach them everything they need to know?" The beauty about the bible is that you can rest on it. Everything they need as young adults can be found in a roadmap of 66 chapters.
"Spouting off before listening to the facts is both shameful and foolish."-Proverbs 18:13