When I began this blog it was because The Lord had weighed it heavily on my heart that He had a message. My life is full of God stories & redemption stories that need to be told.
I also agreed with myself that "when He quit speakin' I'd quit preachin'." I am blown away by the words He's given me. Honestly, I can look back on the entries and clearly see that the words did not come out
of my small brain.
of my small brain.
Some of the topics He's put on my heart aren't politically correct. In fact they probably aren't things people want to hear. Several stories Facebook has even blocked or limited the number of people who see them.
With that said I've started a blog thru blogger. The same entries will appear there daily as well. If The Lord moves you to read them and you don't see an entry on Facebook you can read it at http//elizabethcondrey.blogspot.com .
I am not, nor do I claim to be, "anointed", a "prophet" or a "Noah" so to speak, as many of you have messaged me. This has nothing to do with me and everything to do with Him. I am simply a woman who listens every day, all day long, to what the Holy Spirit is putting on my heart.
This summer is the first time in my 48 years I have felt Him pressing this intently on my soul to write. It's almost uncomfortable. He is definitely pushing me out of my comfort zone.
Eight years ago if I had met me I'd think I was crazy too! I totally get that! Also know that I have the privilege , or misfortune depending upon how you look at it, of many days to do nothing but read and pray.
When I started getting sick, almost ten years ago, I was depressed as well as in total pain.
I owned my own company, I was a gym rat, had a place at the beach, incredibly rigorous kids activities, supper club, bridge club, church boards, school boards, a women's golf league and bible study.
Our youngest daughter was showing ponies all over the Southeast and our oldest daughter was trying to get a collegiate athletic scholarship.
This involved my husband and I alternating weekend horse travel and weekend field hockey travel as far away as Maine and California. I was depressed because all of this came to a grinding halt when I got sick.
I had no idea how to be still nor did I want to be! Worse than that my family needed me to continue doing all of these things. I simply could not.
I remember the very first time I knew something was incredibly wrong. I had driven our oldest daughter 6 hours to Charlottesville, Virginia to the UVA summer field hockey camp. Her dorm room was on the 3rd floor and did not have air conditioning. I felt really weird. I had driven her to William & Mary the week before and Davidson two weeks earlier. I thought I was just really tired.
As I left her room to walk down the three flights of stairs, to drive 6 more hours home, I couldn't move my legs. I became absolutely panicked. I had to call two security guards to stand on either side of me to get down the steps. Slowly my legs loosened up. I have no recollection of driving home.
Two weeks later my youngest daughter, her horse trainer and I drove the 7 hours to Atlanta to purchase a pony. We got stuck in Atlanta traffic for 2 hours. Picture me driving a diesel truck & pulling a horse trailer. I was already a bit anxious. {And} then my legs went completely numb. I could not feel them! I hurt all over and thought I was coming down with the flu.
The next weekend we were at the beach and I noticed I had blisters all over my hands and feet. I also had a pronounced rash across my nose and both cheeks. I thought I had sun poisoning.
God sent me to a dermatologist in Greenville, North Carolina. This encounter, not only was the start of a fabulous friendship in Christ, (but) also led to our journey to Johns Hopkins, Mayo Clinic and Duke.
There isn't enough time in the day to tell you about my Lupus journey. Other than to say God ordained it, allowed it, and He got my attention! I had no option other than get to know Him, Fall in love with him, depend on Him.
That Fall a friend, from the Mothers Committee (board that I was on at our girls school), invited me to a bible study in Greenville that changed my life. {Yet} I was STILL in total bondage.
Every time I would start to break free the enemy would attack. The more I studied the sicker I got. The rashes covered my body. To the point I would cancel engagements because I looked and felt horrible. Then the debilitating migraines started. It never seemed to end!
During this season we dropped out of our supper club, I had to close my business, my husband and I separated, one of our children was sexually assaulted, one was suspended from school for drinking and my mother was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease.
I did not want to live. I knew The Lord but I was furious with Him! I cursed Him, screamed at Him and denounced my love for Him. {And} then I heard Him clear as day say "Just Rest In Me." I really didn't have any other options so I did.
Here's where I say the things that cause disagreement. You ready?
I'd like to say a loving God would never put me and my family through so many trials. I can't say that because I don't believe it.
I'd like to tell you that an all knowing God would heal me. {But} what if He did? Would I still know without a shadow of a doubt, with all that I am, that my life is held in His hands? Or would I just be healed and go right back to my crazy former physically, socially, monetarily, egotistically driven self and miss the lesson He was trying to teach me?
I'd like to say that a loving God would mend broken friendships. But I can't. He closed all of those doors slam shut. {Yet} He opened the door to the most beautiful, heart felt, God filled friendships--far more than I am worthy of.
You see I've been able to witness God, first hand, bring my husband and children to Christ. I've been able to have second chances.
Both of my daughters have had to come home at different points of this journey. I've been able to witness miracles in their lives!
I've been able to watch God recreate a marriage that was so incredibly broken. I've been able to live a redemption story. How incredibly, magnificently cool is that?!
I think most people don't want to follow Christ for fear of having to give up something. He gave up His life for you. Don't you think He knows what your life is missing?
I think people automatically assume that once they are saved all will be perfect. Well, no. Saying "yes" just gives Him permission to weed through your garbage. He has to cut you back and prune you up so that you will bloom.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: it is a process. Your name was written in the book of life before you were born. It is most probable that you've written your life the way your flesh thinks it should be.
He knows your story and it's beautiful. It's written just for you. Ask Him to show it to you. It may be painful or it may be joyful but it will be life changing. One thing is for certain --it will be awesome!
“He reached down from on high and took hold of me; he drew me out of deep waters"-
2 Samuel 22:17
