The Reflection Of Our Redeemer

It's pretty sobering when you are told you have kidney disease. You realize "Oh, wow, this isn't an infection.  I can't take antibiotics to make it go away."  It is very manageable. However there is no reversing the damage. With kidney disease there are two eventual outcomes: dialysis or transplant. It could be years. This is very, very early.

But even so, in that moment, you realize there is no promise in life other than Jesus. I am the most optimistic person in the world. But I am also a realist. I am really young. Well, I'm middle aged, but you know what I mean. This ain't good.

I haven't cried in a long time. Thursday I poured it out to a dear friend. Like that really ugly cry face. The one when your nose runs and you snort. Yes, you know it. Every woman has experienced it at some point in their lives.  "I've got snakes in my backyard, my father is dying, and this disease has completely changed my appearance, and my life.  I'm still me inside. Everyday I look at the reflection of a woman I don't recognize. Everyday I battle succumbing to the sadness."  It was a good ole fashioned pity party. I haven't had one in a long, long time.

My precious friend gently said "Elizabeth, all of this is being used for His  glory. He's stripping away anything that puts us  before Him.  He's transforming our lives to reflect His  image".  "Well, I wish He'd stop. I am just so very tired".  I regretted the words as soon as they left my mouth. I sounded like a self consumed, spoiled, teenager. "OK, yes, I get that. Doesn't mean I have to like it. I thought He was finished. I  thought the pruning was over."

We talked a lot about what is going on in the world. The diseases, ISIS crisis, the economy. All signs of the season we are living in. I don't have Ebola, I haven't had to worry about being be-headed, and according to worldly standards we live a very comfortable life. I am truly blessed. Truly. So why am I so shaken by all of this? 

For years I've felt different. Very aware that the world is not my permanent home. So why am I so upset with the physical changes in my body? When did I become so vain? Could it be Patricia is right? Is He removing every last bit of "self" left in me? Why now? Could it be that He really is coming soon? Could it be that He is pulling in His last harvest? Preparing us all?

If you knew Jesus was coming back soon what would you do? How would you prepare? How will you react to His  loving you so much that He starts refining you now? Not in a year or ten years. Now. Will you respond with Praise & Thanksgiving? Sadness? Resentment?

How did Jesus respond when His Father sent Him to earth to teach us? He lived without sin. Successfully. He is the only man to ever accomplish that. {Yet} it is what He wants for us. Not because He is sitting on the judgement throne yelling down at us with a pointed finger "You must do this now!" No, our God is a gracious gentleman of choice. Right or Wrong. Follow Him or don't follow Him.  It is your decision. Always has been. Always will be.

Ah, but if we decide to follow Him, Jesus  expects us to apologize for our behavior. He expects us, by His grace, to esteem to His standard of living. 

Likewise you raise your children to know right from wrong. When we send them off to college they have to make decisions. Do they want to walk in the upbringing with which they were raised?  Or do they conform to worldly standards? It is their decision. As their parents we can not force them to do either. We rejoice in their good decisions. We pray thru their poor ones. We hope they repent. We love them regardless. Ultimately it is their decision.

Each of our stories about our courtship with The Lord are magnificent. Because they are ours. They are no doubt joyful, painful, convicting. How do we respond to His pruning? His convicting us? Do we rebel, like some of our own children? Or do we have the graceful maturity to recognize that He ADORES  us. He has our best interest for all eternity at hand. He is trying to separate us from this world. Oh man, can that be painful.

He is coming for His people. I want to be ready. I have absolutely no intention what so ever, God willing, to be on this earth during the chaos and pure hell of the tribulation. So for now I will endure the plucking, the pruning, the cutting away from my life. 

I hope that the end result will be a beautiful, blooming, triumphant, woman who glows in the magnificent reflection of our glorious Redeemer.

“Therefore be on the alert, for you do not know which day your Lord is coming.  But be sure of this, that if the head of the house had known at what time of the night the thief was coming, he would have been on the alert and would not have allowed his house to be broken into. For this reason you also must be
ready; for the Son of Man is coming at an hour when you do not think He will."

Matthew 24:42-44